top of page

Narcissist and the trauma bond

The Narcissist is going to give the new target little tests. So, for example, let’s say you’ve gotten used to receiving sweet little good morning texts from them. One day, you hear nothing. You wonder if something is wrong so you text them. You hear nothing. Crickets. Then 8 hours later, you get a little “hi.” No explanation or response to your text. But now you’re all over them, evidently happy that they are still talking to you. Do you see how that worked? Death by a thousand cuts! The next test might be standing you up on an important occasion. They will ghost you. You look like an idiot & make excuses for their behavior. When they make an appearance three days later, you’re happy they’re alive! Again, they have broken down your boundaries. And then they are certain you have been reduced to a trauma-bonded supply for whom they now lose interest. Narcissists learn this behavior as small children. They will launch a campaign to test you over & over. Until you break. Or until you are replaced.

bottom of page